1. I DO NOT LIKE THIS BEARD! (17” x 8”, pen & ink)

    I do not like this man, with his baldie, bairdie face. Just look at the wind, blowing his chin-coatie into a monsters’ nest! His beard, I name Pandora’s beard; when he combs it, all the terrors of the night blow free.

    Portrait of Carel Brest van Kempen (rigorvitae.blogspot.com/).

     

  2. "Mr. Nobody" - pen & ink - about 9" x 14" - "I’ve had a dead albatross for a head all this time, and nobody’s noticed."

     

  3. "Douchebirds" - pen & ink - 9" x 12"

    I do not like these birds! They’ve stolen my hatband, and are wearing it as a scarf — see how smug! My grandma made that for me, ages and ages ago, sewed it together from scraps of this and that. It took all this time to fade to the perfect shade of nostalgia, and now it’s gone.

    Stupid birds.

     

  4. I DO NOT LIKE THIS MANHOLE! - Pen & ink - 6.9” x 18.7”

    "I do not like this manhole. It looks like a great, horrid beastnose, forcing its way into the world. When I stand here at night, and I open my ears, I swear I can hear the behemoth at the other end of that nose: scrabble-scrabble. SCRABBLE-scrabble. SCRABBLE, SCRABBLE…SNORT!"

     

  5. It looks in your window, and goes “BRAWK!”